Coming clean. Going to be way less active. Bye! (And question at the bottom for how I should leave.)

Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by We3_MPO, May 20, 2018.

?

Do you personally think I should leave?

Yes, because you've been bad for the EMC community. 8 vote(s) 16.0%
No! 8 vote(s) 16.0%
Yes, because you don't sound like you're having fun. 5 vote(s) 10.0%
You should be banned! 2 vote(s) 4.0%
I'm unsure/on the fence. 3 vote(s) 6.0%
It's completely up to you. 34 vote(s) 68.0%
Multiple votes are allowed.
  1. First of all, during the past few months, I have not found any enjoyment from being on EMC. I wanted to revive the MPO again, but I've failed to do so because not that many people there are active, and I've almost run out of people to nominate anyways.

    Secondly, I feel like I have been a problem/nuisance who has been a threat to the quality of the EMC community, in ways such as:
    1. In December 2017, when Finch's leaving thread was going on, I was one of the ones who was adding fuel to the fire, although I was the main one to side against the vast majority there (and the ones who ended up being banned were all in that "majority/anti-Finch team").
    2. I created a bunch of counting forum games and tried to participate in more that had otherwise stopped, and in January 2018, that created the need for the Counting and Alphabet Forum Games Policy. Many people got upset with that quickly and were pleased by the policy change.
    3. From sometime late last year, I had started making a bunch of controversial threads. Most of them, at first, were about things like Atlantropa and global highway systems that got few to no responses, but later, it progressed to more popular/serious topics, and I ended up fighting (mainly with people I already had issues with) over things like gun control and LGBT rights, not because I have no respect for everyone that disagrees, but because I felt like (and still do feel like) those people want nothing but to take our world backwards.
    4. Now, another new policy about Controversial Topics In Statuses has been created, and I feel largely responsible for it. However, again, I just felt like I was doing the right thing, and I also am autistic, gay, and still struggling with those things IRL to an extent, so I have been very tempted to make frequent status updates explaining how I feel. If I can't do that (legally/on EMC) anymore, I feel like I can't (or at least shouldn't) be active at all. I know I have many very supportive friends and family members, but they aren't always there to talk/listen to me, and I have some pretty bad anxiety attacks regularly (especially in Autumn and early to mid Winter), so it tends to be very tempting to update my statuses to let others know what's going on.
    Next, most of the people I know and love on EMC either have also left, aren't usually on my home SMP (SMP6) a lot (let alone at the MPO), or are like me by being active only on forums. This includes most of the approximately fifty (I lost exact count) official MPO members. Also, my home SMP also tends to be very dead/empty barren a lot, and most of the people on there are either new players who leave quickly, a group of people I have had some serious issues with multiple times (including the people I argued with in that LGBT rights thread), or certain staff/visitors who typically aren't on as often or for long (and often sparsely). I know I still have many projects to work on at the MPO, but when (almost) no one else is around even on SMP6, let alone the MPO, I get no satisfaction, and what little I do log on to work on them, often just do a little and am gone fast.

    Also, I've been trying to improve my schedule IRL too. I've been getting more exercise and a better sleep schedule lately, and while it is Summer Break for me now, I'll seriously need to focus in 10th grade (only part of the day, but still), and I quite possibly have a busy June ahead of me. I've also been (unsuccessfully) trying to see my friends IRL and find a boyfriend.

    Finally, I also have been enjoying other games increasingly over the past slightly over two years, just like I had most of my life 4+ years ago. Again, I know I still have many projects to work on at the MPO, but when (almost) no one else is around even on SMP6, let alone the MPO, I get no satisfaction, and what little I do log on to work on them, often just do a little and am gone fast. I do have interest in building roads, building cities, gardening, and although I want to explore, I really want to see what 1.13's oceans will have to offer, and don't want to explore too much outside the MPO's borders because I don't want to just keep claiming land for the MPO that will probably only be sparsely used for a long time, especially when we now have every land biome somewhere (even Mushroom Island and Ice Spikes).

    TL;DR: I'm not finding much enjoyment in EMC, and I (and some others seem to think so too about the latter, although note that I cannot speak for them with 100% accuracy) feel little to no enjoyment on EMC and feel like I am a degrading force to EMC's community. Therefore, I'm leaving, at least mostly/partly, although I really haven't been all that active lately either.

    So this begs the question: Do I leave altogether/mostly leave, or should I just read (to find more people to recruit to the MPO and talk with in PMs) and not post/like much and fly under the radar, dedicating most of my activity to forum PMs and especially the MPO? Please answer this if you have a decent answer, as I have been constantly torn on the issue for at least six months now.

    Also, I am very sorry if this thread/OP breaks EMC rules in any way, but I tried as hard as I can not to while still getting the important points across. Please, do not use this as a way to cause drama like what I seem to have been doing, and what happened on Finch's leaving thread. EMC is not the place for drama or rudeness, and that's even part of why I feel like leaving, and as Krysyy said, the Controversial section that I've more recently chosen not to participate in is the place for controversial discussions (unless you're otherwise willing to keep it to PMs).
  2. You don't need other players telling what you should feel/do. Only you can truly self-evaluate and make that decision.

    If it's any help, I think you should take a break to self-evaluate for at least a week before making any decision, then do so for yourself and not for others or validation of any kind.
  3. It's up to you mate, I'm less active on EMC mainly because Minecraft, as a whole, isn't that appealing to me as it was when I first started playing it when it was Minecraft 1.0. Not only that, but higher level priorities have taken control of my life and they're much more important than an online game.

    If you really don't want to leave entirely, then you can do what I'm going to do:

    Put all your valuables in your vault pages, abandon your res, and come online whenever you want. That way you don't lose anything important forever, as it'll be in your vault, but yet you have no obligation to check in every week just to keep your res safe.

    The online website is up to you, but I think that's easier to access than ingame, so I'd say keep it to that if it's too much to play the game.
    We3_MPO likes this.
  4. Thanks for the advice. However, I still vote, and both of my accounts have had Permanent Derelict Protection for quite some time, so losing my reses is absolutely not an issue.
    ShelLuser likes this.
  5. I completely agree with Krysyy- this isnt the decision of the community. I would do some self-evaluating/soul searching for a while before deciding for yourself what you want. Though if you decide to leave, know you will be missed :)
  6. Warning: Shell Vent Incoming (I'm the Shelly now, mwhahahahaha)
    ___________^POTATO____________________________________________________________
    This decision is entirely up to you. I feel that you have had very many threads leading up to this point, and you describe multiple ways that you are not having fun. The main point of EMC is to be fun, and if you cannot find it here, chase your dreams. Follow your passions. Just because you leave, doesn't mean you have to leave forever. This is Minecraft, just play the game! If people are shooting you down, rise higher. If you can't get people to join your outpost, maybe you are trying to hard. Remember what is important and do not let your emotions overwhelm you. Play your way. If you dislike other people's company, go into solitude. If you love other's company, make friends. Everyone on Empire is a family, and you just have to find the right people with similar interests. Remember this decision is up to you! (I'm not going to vote in the thread because I am not on the fence, but I am not anywhere else? :confused:)

    Sorry Shelly! *Proofreads* *Thinks to self hmmmmm that is a bunch of repetition... Oh well. It is inspiring!
    We3_MPO likes this.
  7. Thanks for the advice, but it's hard for me to not let my emotions overwhelm me. My mom also has the same issue, so maybe I got it from her, but it may also be that I'm 15 (probably both). Also, I know I don't have to leave forever, but when I say "leave" and don't mention it just being a break, I mean for an indefinite amount of time. I'm even starting to feel like I have no control whatsoever over my fate, and that trying to go against the flow just drains energy and happiness from me even more than it would already, because it seems like when I want something to happen, either it happens very rapidly (sometimes without it even being asked or mentioned, but not always), takes quite a long time to happen, or else hasn't happened yet at all.

    Also, I do agree that I think I saw this coming well before it actually happened.
    ShelLuser likes this.
  8. Oof, this sounds like my return thread back onto Emc.
    WitherDoggie and We3_MPO like this.
  9. This choice belongs to you, regardless of how other community members feel. You are the one in control of your emotions and thoughts, so don't try to let other people change them.
    I think that you should take a break - if you don't get any enjoyment from EMC, it's probably time to find something else.
    I wish you luck with this process, and I sincerely hope that you go with the option they you think is right for you.
  10. Ok, so your definitely in a situation here. From what I could gather your regretting the fact you started a slew of drama induced posts and threads across multiple places. Now that your at this point, you’d like to know what to do in regards to your activity on the EMC forums and server.

    Well, most of the posts here are giving some good advice on how you should go about considering your choice. I definitely agree that when your in a better state of mind you should consider your full choice so you don’t do something you’ll regret. Just remember, it is your choice, no one else’s.

    Man this reminds me when I had to make a call on a serious decision that would effect a lot of people, make sure you make the right choice.
  11. If you're going to leave, then leave. If you're going to stay, then stay. But quit making threads going back and forth.
  12. I do, however, also believe that I probably care way too much about what others think, and that may well even be tightening the path to my ultimate goal. I wish I could help it, but don't think I can.
    ShelLuser likes this.
  13. Not to say it like this, but many members of the EMC Community don't know you so asking the EMC Community won't do too much.
    IsaacNorman and We3_MPO like this.
  14. Can you use a normal font color? It hurts to read.
  15. Hey, you're not taking all the responsibility for that controversial status rule thing. I'll take some of the credit too, alongside those who use the space to preach their love of Israel and say disgusting things about Palestinians (all the while stopping people from commenting on their profile...huh), those who use it to show their patriotism/love of bombing people, and... a couple of other things/people, probably, although that's all I can think of.

    I personally don't think you should go anywhere. The only issue I have with the way you present your views is it gets slightly preachy and feels like you're attempting to police people. I agree with them, for the most part, but there's things like when, the other day, you corrected someone on a historical figure's quote about 'the right man for the presidency', adding something like "and women! and [a plethora of genders and sexualities]". I get that the issue is close to your heart and I know what autism does to the thought process, so it's forgivable, but I feel like that's one thing you might be able to work on if you don't want others to get annoyed at you.

    Again, I want to re-iterate that I support and agree with your views. I'm sure most who have seen even a few posts of mine in the controversial section are well aware that I subscribe to the ideology of socialism; one that advocates for the equality of the rich, the poor, the blacks, the whites (even equality of the white races!), the gays, the sexes, the blahblahblah. And on top of that, I disagree with the authoritarianism of socialism and am a libertarian, which just reinforces those views I listed. I just get annoyed when things get preachy/SJW-y/forced/basically everything the left wing does to the get their point across now.

    As for whether you should stay or not, it's up to you - but as I said before, I think you should stay. You're alright.
  16. I wonder if it was that decision you're referencing, and if it is, it totally killed me to make it too :(

    @We3, im inactive in the mpo myself, i wish it was more active, im sorry to see you go, but if you want to ever talk hit up my pm box!
    SansTheTimeLord and We3_MPO like this.
  17. Awww, not you too? :(

    To be very honest here all those threads I've seen happening right now did serve one purpose to me personally: they fuel my desire to do 'more'. I actually have something planned, which I need to work that out a bit more and "channel" it a bit (in the end this is all but a game to me. A game I treat very seriously, but a game nonetheless. Ergo: it should be fun and continue to be fun).

    I'm sorry to hear that. But the enjoyment part is something which cannot be easily fixed. In my personal perception there are 2 major kinds of Minecraft players: those who can entertain themselves and those who need to be entertained.

    And don't get me wrong: it's a very blurry line. Going into the waste gets you into contact with hostile mobs: you get a challenge, thus gameplay, thus entertainment. The problem though is that this can easily get boring over time after which you should probably try and find new challenges. And that's often the tricky part.

    Pardon my somewhat direct wording: bullshit.

    No, I don't try to deny that you felt this way but the idea that you became a threat to the quality of the whole community? Sorry: it's nonsense. What kind of a over sensitive community would this be if it couldn't survive a critical source? There is a HUGE difference between being critical and/or expressing yourself in a critical way and becoming a plain out nuisance.

    If you got to a point where you became disruptive then I am sure the EMC staff would have acted.

    And here's a theory which isn't favored by many: sometimes we also need those critical comments, those nay sayers, those people we don't agree with.

    True story: When I want to buy myself a new piece of tech one of the first things I do is look around for negative reviews, critics, and complaints. After I look around for specs and reviews which can convince me that I really want to buy this. But after my decision that I want to buy something the rulebook goes out of the window and I'm going after all the bad stuff.

    And there lies the problem... people who are all in favor of the product usually don't like that. Well.. only the fanboys who are a little bit fanatical anyway. Casual users generally don't care either way. But the thing is: the negative reviews are just as important as the positive ones. Because they help to balance the scale.

    So I am going to be "that" guy here....

    I remember that thread, I even outed quite some critical comments myself. (which I just looked up).
    Basically I can say the same thing, everyone can: by responding you were automatically adding fuel to the fire which was essentially a bit of a toxic thread to begin with.

    In my perception you've been no different from me or anyone else responding. Perception We3....

    Yes you did. But I don't think you kept 'm alive on your own, right? For the record: I know for a fact that Aya was disappointed that the 'gender wars' thread also got into the cross fire. I'm not sure but I wouldn't even be surprised if she PM'd Krysyy because of that.

    Thing is though: I am also convinced that even despite that bit of disappointment she never blamed anyone. Not the staff, not you, no one.

    Look dude... you may have created that thread but you weren't alone in keeping it going. Most of all, the one thing which honestly matters to me the most: did you create those with malice in mind or to goof around and have some fun? I think we both know the answer to that.

    Maybe you overdid it. Look, we all do at times.

    So? I honestly fail to see the problem. You're passionate about certain aspects, why would that be an issue? You have no respect for anyone that disagreed?

    Honest question: what do you feel about those aspects now?

    Honest (trolling!!) question: I disagree with you here, so where does this leave me?

    Dude... my advice is to get off the linear bandwagon and realize that we grow in life. Our perception expands, our opinions change (or not!) and.... so? But so can you! I see a lot of self reflection here, and in all honesty.. It impresses me. You can work on this if you want, and set your mind to it!

    (Sorry for the troll there ;) )

    New policy? Hmm, need to look that up. Still: why consider this to be a bad thing?

    I am going to be very direct here (be warned! :mad: ): you weren't banned by staff or anything, so it couldn't have been that bad. Stop making excuses. You're being autistic, gay, etc. who cares? I don't. To me you're We3_MPO, a Minecraft player I (still!) respect.

    Second: so running away is your answer? Once again: I think you're making up excuses.

    But most of all: instead of running away why not try and work within the limitations? Sometimes those limits can bring out the best in us. I know it probably sounds awfully cliché, but have you never wondered WHY it has turned into a cliché in the first place? Hmm... maybe because many people kept saying this time and time again. Now why would they do that? I dunno... maybe because it's actually true?! :eek:

    Look: if you're bored with EMC then that's nothing to be ashamed off. In fact, I applaud you for bringing this up to us and sharing how you feel.

    But I am being honest with you here: I think you're making up excuses.

    Work within your limits! Get that message you want to out across but do so within the confines of what you have. OR... choose a different platform for it (I think Wordpress is a cool site to do so). EMC is Extra Mild Chat. And I also sometimes get myself into "trouble" over that (for me "trouble" equals to "staff seeing the need to edit your post", to my knowledge my stance with staff hasn't changed at all, but I do consider it a bad thing that I provided staff with a need to edit at all (edits I fully agree with btw)). You're not the only one having issues ;)

    Thing is... I still fully stand behind everything I wrote. But I also acknowledge that me sharing that on EMC wasn't the best of ideas.

    See, this is what I meant with those limitations... With the freedom we have here (which I seriously enjoy and appreciate) it's sometimes also easy to forget that essentially this is still a Minecraft platform. I am here because of my love and passion for Minecraft... NOT necessarily to deal with real world issues and problems.

    You know you could also just move to SMP2? :D

    Ok, that was a bad joke ;) sorry!

    But heck, I know how you feel. Honestly. 'My' server is SMP2 because that's where I started, the others have always been kind to me (and obviously vice versa) and this has gone so much that SMP2 is truly "MY" server. No, it's not mine to rule or anything (please no!) but it is MINE because I love SMP2.

    SMP2 is Poof who turned into a mother (so much respect and love from me!) and who still plays. Not to mention MrPoof (that had be grinning!). SMP2 is LadyJaye and Superi0n and me learning they actually have a father :eek: ), who would have guessed?). .. who also plays on SMP2 (KnightZeroOne). Sorry guys but just talking about you lot brings a smile to my face (seriously!).

    Where I'm going with this? Simple.. SMP2 isn't doing well lately. That is... (here is the issue): if you value quantity. Sometimes I see Aya gloating (in a fair way!) how SMP4 has 12 players and SMP2 has 4. Please do not pick this up in the wrong way guys... Because I easily gloat back... "SMP2 has a cool Dalek, what do YOU guys have?". It's a game between us, ok?

    My point though: SMP2 is a bit at a loss right now from my perspective. But that is no reason for me to give up. Instead, the opposite. I "fight" back. Players leave.. I'm still sad about Aussie_Zaid myself. But please: don't stare blindly at the past and that which was, Minecraft is a dynamic game (or can be): also open yourself up the future!

    I missed SSRC, a lot, but I also met other players who kept pushing into those same directions (YO Elfin_Carrot!). I don't like how Aussie_Zaid is always derelict, but I am going to build my own skin comp area real soon and.. I met other new players who also managed to gain my respect and admiration.

    SMP2 is a bit down at some times. But that's only numbers... and I am not abandoning it, instead I'm trying hard to turn it around. When push comes to shove our server has veterans (Hi Poof!!) coming to the aid of a new player who just lost all their stuff. ..because of their own dumb actions (attacking Momentus). While we don't have to... and we still do.

    I know (read: have seen) servers where no one cared one single bit.

    This game is also what you make of it.

    Why on Earth do you allow forum stuff to affect you in-game? See, that's what I don't get... Who cares if someone disagreed with you on the forums: they may still agree to help you dig out coal and stone and iron to build a base. Because building a base can be fun and then you can move onto other stuff.

    My honest tip: learn how to agree that you disagree on certain points.

    And this is why I am usually selfish :)

    This may sound odd coming from someone who has build somewhat of a reputation of helping others but there is an honest truth to this. I take pleasure in helping people, but I do not necessarily care about feedback. I enjoy it, of course, and I'd be lying if I said likes didn't mean anything to me. Thing is though: I do not rely on them.

    I sporadically also write posts on EMC because of the post and because of what I believe in. I take pleasure in the writing and sharing and anything beyond that is the figural icing on the cake (you have no idea how much it pleases me to grasp sayings like that ;)).

    In game: I dig tunnels, I create safe spaces for players to mine, I sometimes advertise them but that's... it. I do those things because I had fun, I did stuff, me myself and I. Sounds arrogant, no doubt. But that is just the thing you sometimes need.

    I even try to circumvent post limits! :eek:

    Seriously?

    I honestly take deep pride in seeing this:
    Notice the stone brick path!

    I dig tunnels with the hope of them getting used. When I saw this it turned a HUGE smile on my face. Not only did players recognize my stuff, then USED it too. And let's be honest here: all what happened is someone (it could even have been 1 player) digging out some stuff.

    I no care: I didn't build that tunnel for said player in the first place but only to help me get to my waste base.

    See? that is what I like to do.. play the selfish part. MY tunnel, I no care. But of course I LOVE it when you DO use it (and get rich because of it).

    This turned into a rant.. Sorry Potato, there can only be one Shell :p

    My take...

    Learn your limits (staff is honestly lenient enough unless you make REALLY bad doodoo's) work within said limits and finally.. If the game bores you.. then call it for what it is. It happens. To all of us.

    I for one wish you all the best my friend.

    Thanks for sharing, thanks for being honest. My mind about you hasn't changed. one single thing bit.
  18. I don't want to be rude, but it would be better for you to stop continuing on with the apologetic threads and the constant bring ups of your past, it is starting to seem like attention seeking. Although, with that said, take a 2 or more week break to clear your head, it's healthier for you.
  19. I'm going to take Krysyy's, _Bunni__'s, and SansTheTimeLord's advice by taking some time (probably between a few days and half a month) to contemplate my decision a bit. However, if I do revert my decision, it'll probably only be a partial return. I will announce my decision when I have had some time to contemplate it, and I will still be on a bit, mainly to vote for myself, my mom, and two long-gone friends who I'm helping avoid go derelict by voting for them.
    ShelLuser and PhoenixAffinity like this.
  20. Can you not make this a huge thing once it comes time for that? This whole thing just seems like you are trying to stir up the forums for more drama, especially when i see this thread where you are asking how you return, but you are now leaving again? Just leave or come back to the server without making several threads that spark debate or drama. And for your little poll at the top of this thread. Is it really necessary to make everyone's vote public? it turns the poll biased almost immediately for the people who don't want to be exposed for having a minority opinion. Take it from people like CoryLovesYou or finch.. Big leaving or coming back threads normally don't work and only cause trouble or makes you look like a fool.

    As for my vote: I voted " Yes, because you've been bad for the EMC community." because I just find that you along with several other people have kept all this drama going on for the past few months. Now I also think that if you were to evaluate yourself and maybe take a step back from controversial threads or just posting in general, you leaving or taking a break really isn't necessary. I really don't have an issue with you outside of your drama. It's just that this drama just kind of makes me not really want to go on the forums because whenever I come here, I basically just look for the new drama that's going on that day.

    I hope you come to a solution that doesn't turn into a huge drama pool.