The Minty Encounterwritten by Baradar Like all wars, it began simply with an argument. In this case over who could do the most damage on the servers, Simon with his lightning bolts and magic or Chin being well, just Chin. Chin wandered around the swamp they were in, breaking witches and their huts while Simon blasted the slimes that jumped around. Maybe the gas created from the blasted slimes affected them or the witches fought back with magics that enraged them but it soon devolved into a battle, Simon and his clone army of B4d M3n and Chin with his army of player disciples wielding broken sticks.The Stage was literally set and other senior staff began lining up behind one or the other, betting on the outcome. But something happened that no one expected, a bird had snuck into the fray. It's still unclear whether it was a chicken or duck or some unlucky green bird that had wandered in from Aikar-knows-where but soon there were battles all over. B4d m3n vs disciples, chicken vs duck, boulder vs giant. What had begun as a minor argument had turned into a dreaded thing, Staff War I.At first, the chickens were outnumbered by their slow hatch rate. The war raged for days with the chickens able to get a hold of flame II bows to make up for their lack of numbers. The stacks of roasted duck that covered the field could fill a double chest.But the ducks fought back, stealing the unborn soldiers of their enemy before they could take the field.. The feathers flew as the ducks attacked one last time until only 2 birds were left standing, both in lime green coats.Meanwhile another battle had developed as BigDavie's giants took the field to take all the roast duck for their dinners. Unperturbed, a mountain of boulders came rolling down to take care of the last of the chickeneer's children, thinking an omelette would be a good choice. But when Dwight decided a quick snack of roasted duck would be in order, BigDavie flew into a ducklike rage and sent his giants to stop Dwight and his boulders from stealing his dinner.Seeing this, Dwight unleashed his boulders, throwing them with godlike strength at the giants where they fell, pummeled and pummeled again until they were little more than one-eyed, squished minions. The boulders themselves were smashed on impact into nothing more than pebbles leaving the swampy battleground covered in rocky waste with little blue and yellow munchkins tripping and falling.Seeing the minions would make perfect additions to his broken army, he began arming them with broken sticks. But as fast as he could break the sticks, the B4d M3n found and destroyed the blue and yellow munchkins. Eventually the army of disciples and minions outnumbered the B4d M3n and casualties increased on both sides until only a few survived.Ducks, eggs, minons, pebbles, sticks and B4d M3n were strewn across the battlefield. In the end, only the senior staff themselves were still standing. At this point, realising no one would win, Chin decided to break Stage once and for all. Taking his last stick he uttered the foul words never before heard, "I mean to break it, all of it!".Suddenly realising the terror of the situation, the other five rushed towards him, uttering commands left and right but to no avail. Their shrieks of terror rose to the point where those on Olympus could hear them, Aikar and Krysyy.Looking down, Aikar just nodded, pressed the "stop recording" button on his OBS console and handed Krysyy a large wad of paper rupees. Taking the wad she smiled, "I told you they would go mad if we left them alone for too long. I've got this."Floating down from on high she took out a handful of her special Gems and launched them at the battlefield. The SS were instantly stopped in their tracks, frozen with trepidation as they realized they were being watched. Chin's disciples disappeared, returned to their SMPs with no memory of what had happened. The Gems began flying around in a circle, creating a whirlwind that strengthened into a tornado. The minions and ducks, sticks and pebbles, eggs and B4d M3n, all began flying within the tornado. Chests appeared below and were soon filled with the remains of the battle.The First Staff War was over with no real winner, the normal result from war. The Gems final act was to remove the madness that gripped the SS, leaving them with the memory but no real reason as to why it occurred. As their eyes cleared they realised the chests had disappeared, gone as the tornado subsided. Even Krysyy's Gems had gone. Hidden within the marshlands that was the battlefield, scurried a large evil-looking toad along with some friends lined in dark green. They carried the chests away, hoping to sell their loot on the open market and make their fortunes. At least, thats what they thought would happen however the power of the Gems was on them. No one knows where these chests may appear next or what will happen if unleashed on the SMP's. Let's pray it never happens. Let's also pray that the noxious fumes or witches magic never affect anyone else in the future.