Chuck Norris Facts

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous' started by mayorprofessor, Nov 11, 2013.

  1. I found this amazing website with Chuck Norris Facts on it. If you don't know what a Chuck Norris Fact is, you are dead to me.
    Link to the website:

    Some facts about Chuck Norris
    • Aliens do exist. They're just waiting for Chuck Norris to die before they attack.
    • Chuck Norris uses a stunt double, for crying scenes.
    • Chuck Norris made a happy meal cry.
    If you have any Chuck Norris facts, post them in this thread
  2. Chuck Norris was born in March, but many people believe he was born on May the second, 1945, because that is when the Battle of Berlin (WWII) was won and the Germans were so scared they pulled out.

    That is also my birthday :p Although it was not 1945...
    Slip_Stream and KingGeorge3rd like this.
  3. george, you just got folloe\wed
  4. thats unrelated to this thread
  5. Chuck Norris doesn't use the toilet, he scares the crap out of it
  6. chuck norris once urinated on a semi truck, that semi truck is now known as optimus prime
  7. Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.

    Chuck Norris has a beard because everytime he tries to shave, his hairs break the blades.

    When a zombie apocalypses starts, Chuck Norris doesn't try to survive. The zombies do.

    Why does Chuck Norris sometimes use machine guns? Because even Chuck Norris thinks some people need a chance sometimes.

    Yeah, I think these are quite funny :p There are alot more where they came from, but those are the pick of the bunch ~FDNY21
  8. ok, unfollowed :mad:
  9. If you need to give something to Chuck Norris, he has taken it from you already. ;3
    Slip_Stream and FDNY21 like this.
  10. chuck-norris-uzis.jpg
    • Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.
    • Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
    • Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are known today as Giraffes.
    • Chuck Norris can light a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together.
    • Chuck Norris' cowboy boots are made of real cowboys.
    • There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
  11. Don't you mean ''into it''?
    Jimbonothing64 likes this.
  12. How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris?
    All of it
  13. Nope.
  14. If he scares the shit ''out of it'' that either means he scares it into himself or just blasts it to the roof...

    If he scares it ''into the toilet'' he scares it out of his body into the toilet
  15. He CAN believe it's not butter
    He can cut a hot knife with butter
    He can burn ants without a magnifying glass at night
  16. Chuck Norris can do both
  17. I'm not really into Chuck Norris jokes but oh man this one is a good one...
    princebee likes this.
  18. That one was incorrect. He UPPERCUT a horse, not kicked
    technologygeek likes this.