If I ask the unasked question, I would be asking it, therefore creating a paradox, therefore messing up mind.
That means: Wow boys are funny I don't want to talk about tht, thanks. Now you will... If you try to fail and succeed, what have you done? Fail. How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire? Sun, summer and other facts, and also bad luck. Why is the time when the traffic is slowest called rush-hour? Because everyone is trying to rush. What's the speed of dark? Dark does not exist. If physics can predict lottery numbers, why are they still working? They can't because lottery is random. If you run backwards will you gain weight? Obviously nope. If Barbie is so popular, why do you need to buy her friends? Because it is a toy. What happens when you get scared half-to-death twice? You die half two times. Can a blind person feel blue? Yes because blind persons have feelings. How can a house burn up when it burns down? The fire goes up and the house, down. Are you telling the truth when you lie in bed? Yes as long as you're not lying If your vacuum cleaner really sucks, is it a bad thing? Yes because if it sucks it doesn't sucks. How do you know when a Smurf suffocates? He turns purple lol Despite the cost of living, why does it remain so popular? Because it is a gift, they give it to you and you have to take care of it. If a word in a dictionary is misspelled, how would you know? You use Google translator or ask a person who knows. In Chinese why are the words for crisis and opportunity the same? Crisis is a time for opportunities, not just misery and poverty. Why does X stand for a kiss? It's a symbol. Why does O stand for a hug? It's a symbol. Why is the alphabet in that order? They could have put it in another order, it's just random. How does skating on thin ice get you into hot water? You sweat? Why are they called stands when there made for sitting? The stand is actually standing Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected expected? Yes, it makes the unexpected expected but anyways you can't expect an unexpected thing. When cheese gets its picture taken what does it say? Potato! At least we say that in Spain... Why are they called non-stick pans? Is there a law saying your not allowed to put sticks in them? They are called non-stick pans because they food does not get stuck on them. Why are a wise-man and a wise-guy opposites? Because they are expressions and expressions' meaning is often random. If work is so terrific how come they have to pay you to do it? They pay you so it is even more terrific! Should crematoriums give discounts for those who died in fires? ROFL Is it possible to have a civil-war? Yes there was one in Spain in 20th century If the #2 pencil the most popular, why is it still #2? It isn't the #2, it is the #1 Do tea makers have coffee breaks? No, they have tea time Can fat people go skinny-dipping? Yes Why do they announce power shortages on TV? Because TV is stupid Do you need a silencer when you shoot a mime? Not if you mean to kill him Why do you press harder on the remote-control when you know the battery is dead? There is a small percentage that the batteries resurrect How can batteries die? Their life power runs out. If its zero degrees tonight, and tomorrow its meant to be twice as cold, how cold will it be? It is impossible, cold does not exist. Why are buildings called buildings when there finished? Shouldn't they be called builts? Another symbol Why is abbreviated such a long word? Symbol Why is it that when you tell a man there are 400 billion stars he will believe you, but when you tell him there's wet paint he has to touch it? a)He's stupid b)He wants to bother you c)He forgets Who's cruel idea was it to put a 'S' in 'lisp'? Symbol Do you find it unnerving that what doctors do is called 'practice'? Um no... Would a fly without wings be called a walk? No. If a turtle doesn't have a shell is it homeless or naked? Mangled and probably dead Can vegetarians eat animal crackers? They CAN Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections? Why not? 1.- Can you cry under water? Yes -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 2.- How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered? I don't know -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 3.- Why do you have to 'put your two cents in'... but it's only a 'penny for your thoughts'? Where's that extra penny going to? Me -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 4.- Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity? Heaven is just as you want it to be -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 5.- Why does a round pizza come in a square box? Square boxes are easier to produce -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 6.- What disease did cured ham actually have? None -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 7.- How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage? Ideas are random -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 8.- Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up like every two hours? Because they wake up every two hours and cry. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I'll answer more later.
