Lamar's Wedding (Warning: Lots of Pics)

Discussion in 'Public Member Events' started by Kephras, Jul 18, 2013.

  1. This is the story of a most unusual union. A tale of love at first sight, and a whirlwind romance that would result in SMP8's most memorable wedding - perhaps the greatest wedding in the whole Empire. Our story begins with two friends, seeking adventure in the wastelands...

    Lamar arrived at the Northwest Outpost late in the night, to find his partner Kephras busily clearing away monsters from the base of the eastern steps. After a brief discussion, they determined they would head northeast into the desert, following the cobblestone Sky Road to flatter terrain and better hunting. The journey took them most of the early-morning hours, leaving them the full day to prepare.

    Keph set up a sniper's post, borrowing ladder from a nearby village, while Lamar scouted the terrain. When dusk set in, they set to work, with Keph calling out dangerous targets from his perch and sniping lesser ones while Lamar laid waste to the enraged monsters with his sword. In the hours just before dawn, a terrible adversary appeared - the dreaded Marlix. While they debated whether to engage, it fled east, disappearing beyond their view. Thus, they set about tracking it eastward, into a stand of snow-capped pines.

    Lamar used the bones of his slain skeletons to recruit two nearby wolves, and Kephras did the same with a third. For amusement's sake, he bred his with one of Lamar's and brought about a small pup to join their travel. And travel they did, over desert and taiga and grassland hills, pausing nightly to defend themselves from the spiders, skeletons, and zombies. The fighting took its toll on the small pack though - an unfortunate creeper put an end to most of the dogs. By the time they reached the far desert and prepared to head home, only Keph's original dog remained - a survivor of three creepers, one enraged, and several nights of hard combat. He egged the battle-scarred canine and they made for the southern coast.

    And that is when Lamar saw her. Three blocks tall, slender and spiny, her peak tipped with a pink desert flower, she enchanted him on the spot. Perhaps the loss of his dogs drove him mad. Perhaps it was the loneliness of traversing so many deserts. Whatever the reason, he stripped off his armor on the spot and made sweet prickly love to the cactus then and there, beneath the hot desert sun. She returned home with him that night, and the next day, a young cactus grew on the lawn beside its mother, its top bearing Lamar's features.

    The townsfolk of SMP8 could not stand for such a scandal. A child born out of wedlock? How improper! They set about organizing a wedding at once for the couple, with Luckygreenbird presiding over the ceremony as pastor. Seffychan arrived bearing the Fish of Marriage, so that Lamar could exchange his vows with the cactus.


    After some debate, it was decided Lucky's tiny chapel was unsuitable for such a momentous occasion, and so the wedding was moved to Schlaf's Cathedral, north of the central Frontier outpost. After brief preparation and a night of rain, the ceremony commenced.

    (in attendance: Bunkerllama, Baby_Cookies, Seffychan, CreepyBanana1000, Luckygreenbird, myself, and of course Lamar.)

    For a moment, it seemed the proceedings would end in bloodshed, when Bunkerllama voiced his objections to the union, but he was quickly silenced. Lamar and the cactus exchanged their vows in the Cathedral, and everyone returned to town to celebrate.


    Lucky hosted the reception in his Party Room, with cake and fireworks, dancing and music.


    And as for the honeymoon? Well that's between Lamar and his thorny bride, dear reader. Our part in the story concludes here - for now...
  2. *Sniff* That was so, beautiful...

    That is, until someone needs green dye.
  3. Lamar and the cactus had a dance to themselves at Seffy's Discotech after the reception.
    They danced to Strad.

    [I still don't know who the wife is, did we agree it was Lamar?]
  4. Lamar is Seffy's wife, but the cactus is his.
  5. Now you see, this is why Notch added multiplayer, that stuff right there.
    For true love that goes beyond the boundaries of race, religion and species. ;-;
  6. I would have taken you guys to Schlaf's bigger cathedral, but it wasn't finished
    Schlaf abandoned the town after it was heavily griefed and brenjone has been slowly restoring it, mainly to finish the second cathedral
  7. ...
    Mirr0rr likes this.
  8. So the cactus is Seffy's wife-in-law?
    Gawadrolt and PandasEatRamen like this.
  9. ;-;

    that was absolutely

    xI_LIKE_A_PIGx likes this.
  10. That was genuinely a sight among all men that will forever be remembered as a historic moment in time that will never happen again (one can only hope) my congratulations (and condolences) to Lamar and his lucky bride. May they never be torn apart (but I guarantee she will be a thorn in his side ;)) and her love may be acidulous in nature but a warm, kind, aeipathy, belladonna heart may forever have his name engraved to it, from now, and until time ends. (Or we need to get some green dye fast, whichever comes first)
    Kephras and RainbowChin like this.
  11. No one will be sacrificing Mrs. Ramal to the furnaces for some dye... her children however... you'd have to ask Lamar about that.
  12. Sooo your saying that two people got married... in Minecraft :confused:...
  13. If you look at the pics there's a person, a 3 tall cactus and a small one with said person's head xD. The person married the cactus and they had a cactus-human baby.
    xI_LIKE_A_PIGx and Kephras like this.
  14. Nice you guys got use for my cathedral!
    Luckygreenbird likes this.
  15. I must say, I have never seen anything more fantastic in my life, ill be sending over some green dy- errr that's probably a sore spot, Ill send over some sand to the couple eventually
    Gawadrolt and PandasEatRamen like this.
  16. Lamar... I leave town for like 2 seconds and then this sides hurt
  17. I love it when my Wives get Married.
  18. Where's it at? I wanna check it out.
  19. *cough*
  20. just north of main spawn for the frontier on smp8, take the tunnel