Grandmother death soon, new ww2fan.

Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by ww2fan168, Jul 23, 2015.

  1. Ok, my life has just been punched pretty badly since Ive found out my grandmother is probably going to die in a week or two. She's has a mental disease so she's been gone for a good 5 years mentally but this is now her body passing away. Now in the title of this thread you notice a "new ww2fan", well when i was 10 years old ( 1 month before her mental sake was gone ) she asked me to be a mature young man and just be wise in my actions when she died, now Im here 5 years since then ( 15 ) and she's dying; so Im doing what she wanted me to be and grow up from this childish play style Ive been doing since Ive joined the Empire. As a small portion of EMC has noticed Ive helped players questions using the wiki which is not something most people expect from me, but Im just living the life my grandmother has wanted me to. So if people have been wondering why I haven't been acting so crazy in game its because of this event, of corse I still have a sense of humor and will make a joke or two when I think people would find it funny; just not every minute or so.

    Sincerely,

    ww2.
  2. aww, thats sad :( My grandfather died about a year ago, he was awesome, i know how it feels to have that feeling man.
    ww2fan168 likes this.
  3. I'm sorry to hear she'll be going, I'm sure she was an amazing woman. And it's really nice of you to respect her wishes by maturing more, she'd be proud. If you need anyone to talk to my door's always open.
  4. I'm not going to go ahead and give that generic sympathy. I'm going to be honest. Your grandmother sounds like an amazing person. I personally don't know what it's like to be in your shoes since my grandparents are still alive, but I know that will be a painful day for me. Obviously, since you're going through it right now, life must be hard. Make your grandmother proud. Be that mature man she wants you to be. PM me if you need anything. Again, I'm sorry for your loss of your grandmother.
    ww2fan168 likes this.
  5. I'm sorry to hear that. :(
    ww2fan168 likes this.
  6. First of all my best wishes, I really feel for you. It has been a long time ago since my grandparents passed away but it's a moment I still hold fresh into memory. Also because it's usually the first time in your childhood when you're confronted with death. In your direct surroundings. Worse yet: involving a respected and beloved family member.

    I can well imagine that this is most likely not a pleasant time for you...

    Wise words and a very respectful and noble admiration.

    However, I also want to issue a small warning. Do be careful that you don't risk pretending someone you're not. Now, there's nothing wrong with helping players and it's obviously a very positive thought to try and become and/or remain a respectful person and player. Please don't get me wrong here.

    But being a respectful player involves more than simply helping out players. In general your actions speak for you, no question about that, but the kind of person which you really are even more so. So whatever you do always keep that important aspect in the back of your head as well.

    A player who doesn't always help out new players but who is there for his friends the very moment they need him to be is just as respectful (maybe even more so) than someone who goes out of his ways to simply help out players.

    I'm very careful with choosing my words here, also because this is a very personal issue. If I express(ed) myself in a wrong way then my sincere apologies up front and please tell me so (absolutely no offense taken) because that is the last thing I want to do.

    But even so: you can change who you are, but please do be careful that you don't try to change into something you're not fully comfortable with either. Like I (tried) to hint at above: there's more to be(come) a respectful player and human being than merely helping out others alone.

    Anyway, hang in there. This is most likely not going to be a very nice period you're going through, but yeah.. I really wish you all the best here.

    Sincerely, Peter
    SoulPunisher, jkjkjk182 and ww2fan168 like this.
  7. I know that its not wise to be another person, but this is who I want to be, and its who Im training myself to be as well. I honestly respect your wordings because I need advise in this, but as I said; I can train myself into this life style and I find maturity comfortable with me. If I read it correctly thats my response to your advice and will definitely respect and live it out.
    ShelLuser likes this.
  8. To be honest I wouldn't go that far. Not yet anyway. The only way you'll know if your decision was a wise one or not will be in a few years time. Then you can look back and make that conclusion.

    Thanks for your comment, and yeah. Wish you all the best.
    jkjkjk182 and ww2fan168 like this.
  9. Man I'm so sorry. I hope that you have good people around you to help you through this. All my grandparents died when I was little. I was too young to know that kind of loss. You ever need some to chat to pop on over to 5. You can be crazy with the rest of us :p
    ww2fan168 likes this.
  10. even my computer is in tears :(
    dammit should probably fix that water cooling

    but seriously that's so sad, wish you and your grandma a world of good :)
    ShelLuser and ww2fan168 like this.
  11. First of all, sorry for your loss. I don't know what it's like to be in your shoes - the only grandparent I've ever lost was my granddad, who essentially worked himself (he founded a charity for the terminally ill, which has helped my town a ton) to death in his 50s. He'd be 70-something this year. Obviously, he died a few years before I was born. I do, however, know what it feels like to be worried for a grandparent and I know what it feels like to lose someone who was basically family.

    I admire your loyalty to what she told you to do. A suggestion: don't force it. Ponder what 'maturity' means to you first before you try to work up a 'mature' image of yourself. I used to think that meant abstaining from arguments and fights with people and such - there's much more to it than that. I think an aspect of maturity involves standing up for what you think is right - if you have to get in a fight with someone or argue about something, do it.

    Wisdom comes with age. As ShelLuser said, you won't know what's wise and what isn't until you look back on a decision years later. There's a reason why wise people are usually portrayed as old people: they've had experiences, and plenty of time to think about the things they've done and how it affected others and their life.

    I'm sure your grandmother would be proud of you for doing this. You've kind of inspired me to make good on what my nan told me to do awhile ago: go get a girlfriend... I'll give it a few years, of course :p

    For what they're worth (not much to you, I'm sure), you have my condolences and my best wishes.
  12. Maturity isn't necessarily using knowledge to help others. Maturity is how you do things in life and portray yourself to others. There have been many mature idiots and jackass geniuses.

    Basically, don't do something because you think it is mature. The idea that an activity or action can be mature is one of the most pervasive fallacies that our society continues to uphold. Maturity is held within the person, not the activity.

    I see that you say you are "training" yourself to be who you want to be. I have no doubts that you want to be that person, but training yourself for a change like that isn't always healthy or right. You should just be who you are, not who you think you need to be. Being someone that you are naturally not will come back to bite you.
  13. I know how you feel. I lost a grandfather whom I was very close to about two years ago.

    As for being mature, I have found through the fifteen years of my life that maturity comes not in what you do, not at all. I am not saying that it isn't awesome that you're helping players, thats great. :) I'm just saying that the way I define maturity is being exactly who you are and nothing else. This doesn't mean that you shouldn't or can't have people you admire, just don't be them. Maturity is, completely, not pretending to be someone else... to other people and yourself. Don't worry, if you struggle with this, you aren't alone. This is one of the biggest challenges I am constantly facing.

    Stay yourself. ;)