Grandma's Bible Help

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous' started by Unoski, Nov 20, 2015.

  1. A kid was getting ready to go through college, and before he left, his grandma asked if he needed anything before going to college. He responded "Actually grandma, all I need is money, and a lot of it. College is expensive." The grandma sighed and walked away.

    Before the kid left however, the grandma came up to him and gave him a Bible and told him "I hope this helps you through college." The kid replied "Thanks, grandma, this is exactly what I wanted."

    A few months passed by and the kid was in college, having a good time, when he got a call from his grandma. His grandma asked him how he was doing, what college was like, etc. and the kid replied "It's great, but I'd love some more of what we talked about before."

    She replied, "Have you been reading your Bible?"

    The kid replied, "Of course I have. I am already on chapter 4!"

    "Alright," replied the grandma, they hung up.

    A few more months passed by, and the kid was doing great in college, but money was starting to get tight. He called his grandma in a panic and asked her, "Grandma, I really need money, college is great, and I want to graduate, but to do that I need more money."

    The Grandma asked once again, "Have you been reading your Bible?"

    The son responded "Yes, it's a real page turner -- I wish it was longer!"

    Again, the grandma said "Alright" and they hung up.

    Finally, the time for graduation rolled around, but even though the kid had all As, he had to drop out since he had no more money left. As he was packing up, he saw the last person who he wanted to see call, his grandmother.

    "I heard you're dropping out of school, why is that?"

    "Well, I don't know grandma, maybe it's because I don't have any money!"

    The grandma asked "Have you read your Bible yet?"

    The kid, in frustration, hung up the phone. The last thing he packed away was the Bible. For the first time ever, he decided to open it. Sure enough, on the very first page was an envelope. He opened the envelope and inside was a note from grandma that read:

    Screw you
  2. The suspense. Teaches you to do what you are told :p
  3. I love it.
  4. This is amazing.
  5. It took me awhile to realise that American 'College' is actually University. I spent the whole time thinking 'why on Earth does he need money for College? That's free...'. I then had to go on an epic Google quest to find out if student loans were a thing in the US. They are, but they are completely and totally messed up in every way. I know understand why this kid wouldn't take out a student loan and relied on his nan so much.

    "12/10 your story was very educational. Would not reccomend." - Destructoid
    AverageWalrus and Rhythmically like this.
  6. Lol, free college in America :p Yea right.
    xHaro_Der likes this.
  7. Bernie 2k15
    Best Minecraft Servers
    AverageWalrus and Keliris like this.
  8. This story interesting...I like it :>
  9. That's horrible xD
  10. You got me this time. Enjoy your victory... while it lasts...
  11. Technically it isn't free until you haven't paid it off for something like 15 years. Then it gets wiped from your debt by the government :p
  12. Oooh. This is great. I love it!