Hey everyone, my father has recently been diagnosed with cancer. Doctors are not too sure about the specific details, but so far only Lung Cancer has been confirmed. I am not willing to follow SDAA (Shock, denial, anger, acceptance.) I have passed the stages of shock, denial, anger, but not acceptance. Acceptance has always been hard for me, whether if it was not doing well on a test, or missing an event. I don't know what isn't making me accept this. These couple of days, my heart seems like an anchor dropped on a sea floor, unable to see life in the light. The survival rate is very low. The hope in me has dropped dramatically. Video games have always relieved stress for me. I have been extremely busy lately helping my dad. I am afraid that when school starts, I won't be able to do well on tests, getting bad reputations from my teachers. I have always been good at academics, but stress can really get into the way. I probably should see a therapist, but why waste money when you have EMC.
I can relate so much to you. When I was younger my grandfather passed away from cancer two days after my birthday. The entire week before my father and I were by his side. After he passed I went into a spiral of, I wouldn't say depression, but deep sadness. Everything was really hard to focus on and life just seemed to get harder and harder. I still have days where I miss him a lot, I will always miss him, but all you can do is live life. Don't be upset about the time you have lost, but be happy about the time you had. Also know, the community is here for you, we will help you through this. You can PM me, or anyone, if you need to talk. Also there is always the chance of recovery!
I assume that you still live with your parents (sorry if that may sound odd, just making sure) and that you therefor see your father regularly. My best advice here: whatever you do, try to stay positive. If not for yourself then for him. Try really hard to fight of the negative feelings and emotions. And trust me: that is easier said than done. But if you're together as a family then it can really help to try and be there for each other. At the risk of sounding a bit harsh, which I'm not most certainly not, but with these things also try to look at it from another side. If you're grumpy and sad all day, how could that make your parents feel? And what others said above before me... Fortunately it's not always a decease you can't recover from, doctors can do a lot these days. And another thing: do not base your opinion and fears on the crap you sometimes see in the movies or other television series. There is some truth to be found there, for sure, but as always it's usually overly dramatized and making things look even worse than they sometimes are (and I know how awkward that sounds!). I'm not trying to say that things aren't bad, but some movies and such make it look as if there's never hope, that you always loose all your hair, etc, etc. But it does heavily depend on the issue and varies per cure / disease of course... I really hope for the best here Epic... My thoughts really go out to you and your family. Whatever you guys do, and I'm really serious here, don't give up!
I have definite sympathy for you. I have had multiple experiences where a very close friend and/or family member of mine has passed away due to cancer. I hope your father can make a full, quick recovery.
My granddad passed away about a year and a half ago after a very long battle with cancer. When he was first diagnosed he was given about 3 months, I don't know the specifics but it was a type of pancreatic cancer. He lived happily another ten years after he was diagnosed, so honestly I think that it was either a miracle or "survival rates" are BS. In fact, a friend who was my age passed away three years ago after fighting a brain tumor. He too survived for a long time against all odds. So wether you are religious or not know that I'm praying for the both of you.
I hope he makes a full recovery. If you are worried about school, you should inform your teachers (if you want to, because this is family information) that your father is sick, and some days you may not be able to study for the test or whatever that day because of your father's disease. If you do use this, it helps to have a doctor's note and a note from a parent. The teacher (most likely) will understand that what you aw going through is tough. You should be focused on spending time with your father. This is not easy to come to terms with. It will take a while. The things you are feeling right now is realization, because you are just fully understanding what has happened, and you are probably in shock. You must attempt to stay positive, and then your dad will stay positive, also, if the people around him stay hopeful. You must be strong, because this is is difficult.
