You know him, you love him, you have confusing thoughts about him, he's AlexC__. You may ask yourself, "What do you know about AlexC__, neonkillah? What gives you the right to make an exposee about him?" And you have a fair point. I don't know AlexC__. But this weekend, and I got to know AlexC__ a little better. The real AlexC__. For the sake of simplicity, the rest of this exposee will refer to AlexC__ as Alksy. The clock struck 13, and I sat down with Alksy in my living room. He sported his favorite "I drop bears and spiders" mug. We joked a little about how he always wanted to be a star, and he said something about the conversation being recorded. To get the conversation to a more serious tone, and a completely different subject, I asked Alksy how his childhood was. "It was great, very happy, would rate 9/10". The genius went over my head momentarily. Then it came to me: a childhood, any childhood, bears no frame of reference. Any sort of rating system of a childhood would be arbitrary. Being the optimistic he is, Alksy chose a high ratio. Being the realist, Alksy also chose a non-100% ratio. Not all of us can claim to our genius with such modesty. He mumbled something about how many crumbs there were on the floor, and I pressed on to more interesting questions. Nothing was more sobering to me than the moment when he told me the truth about himself. I asked him if he would rather die by being dragged by the back of a truck, or by being sandpapered to death. He refused to answer, until later on in the interview, he told me this: "Yes, but I was born in England" I don't speak morse code, but I know an encrypted message when I hear one. What Alksy was really trying to tell me, was that no matter what makes your death, you know what you are in life. And Alsky is English born. No truck, no sandpaper can take that away from him. I asked him one last question, about the rest of his national background. I asked him if he was Australian. To my confusion, he replied, "A truck. Much quicker" At this point, I was pretty certain his coffee was getting to him, and he just needed to get out there and start dropping some bears to let loose the energy. So I boded him fairwell, disabled the shock collar and saw him off. All in all, was Alksy the man you saw him to be? Has his pedestal lowered or risen? Comment below, thank you.
